The Tested

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

Author’s Note

In my usual ‘I can never have enough writing apps way’ today I tested — hence the title — out an app that is also a website. I’d never heard of it so didn’t have great expectations. The idea is, you write something, anything, from a poem to a story, click analyse, and it tells you which literary great your writing is most like. I quickly wrote the below to test it out, so please forgive any mistakes. The great thing was, it worked. I was very pleased to be compared to Ursula K. Le Guin and Neil Gaiman on something longer that I can’t share yet. For those who are curious, the app is called ‘I Write Like‘ and is available to download and use online. Hope you enjoy it if you do.


The Tested

There was never so much to worry over than this. For every man, woman and child in the arena, a beast licked a lascivious tongue. For every dream, there was an equal nightmare. I knew. I was one of them.
The lion-man roared a defiance, one great club of a paw sweeping his children towards him. The she-unicorns lowered their heads beside this king of a false jungle as an impenetrable rack of thorns. The snake-men hissed. Banshees screeched. We, by which mostly I mean I, remained unmoved.
The signal came and went, for we had already fallen upon those unfortunate almost-men and women. They never stood a chance. When the carnage settled, he spoke.
“I did not make them, thus, they were unmade.”
He said nothing else, not a word.
God shrunk in my eyes at that moment. His golden radiance dimmed, whilst his demeanour flowed from becalmed to vitriolic tempest. This was the change, the signal, the call we’d heed. The question would become, was our God ready for us?

Thank you for reading


PS Unfortunately, I have absolutely no connection to the above app or website, though if they’d wish to pay me a very large sum of money or gold for mentioning them, I’d happily take it. ;p


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